HISTORY
ANCIENT KEKISTAN
First Kingdom Era (5500-1488 BC)
First Kingdom War Banner of the First Kingdom of Kekistan, circa 5th Millenium BC
The first Kekistani settled in Egypt approximately 5500 years ago. Researchers and Historians now believe the fate of Kekistan was intertwined with Egypt, particularly the Pre-Dynastic Kingdoms dotted around the Nile. The Egyptians seemed to have plagiarized Kek from the Kekistani after their nation fell.
The Kekistani are now known to have traded with most other contemporary cultures, including the Harrapans, the Sumerians and in the Mediterranean, we find evidence of a lot of trade with what would become Italy, where the national anthem Shadilay was first written.
The Ancient Kekistani lived humble yet prosperous lives. They were fiercely individualistic and territorial people. They believed that through farming their land they could sustain their bodies of faith and enact their memes.
As we learn more about Ancient Kekistan, we also learn about their dealings with their closest neighbours. Other nations which until now had been lost to history include Normistan, an empire so boring that no one even remembers it. Along with the Normistan ally of Cuckistan, the ever-present enemy and threat to all Kekistani. Due to its malignant nature, it is believed to have resided somewhere near the Tropic of Cancer. Among the most violent and aggressive of the Cuckistani aristocracy were the Sarkeesian Knights who rose to power around 2000 BC. After many attempted invasions, one final Sarkeesian campaign saw the end of Kekistan for good.
KEKISTANI DIASPORA (1488 BC-present)
During the Fall of The First Kingdom of Kekistan, those who survived wound up roaming the desert. They refused to settle in Normiestan or Cuckistan and instead wandered the Earth.
Secular and Kekist Researchers alike believe that the Kekistani Diaspora has spread to every country on Earth. Famous historical figures with Kekistani heritage include Augusto Pinochet and Donald Trump. Historical Kekistani settlements include Kék, Hungary and Pepe, Italy.
KEXODUS AND SECOND KINGDOM ERA (1298-343 BC)
One group of Kekistani followed a prophet by the name of Pepe, and founded the Second Kingdom of Kekistan near the Caspian Sea. Modern Kekish derives from the Second Kingdom era.
Batrachamyomachia
Artwork depicting a battle the Kek-Greek Wars, circa 13th century BC
The Great Wall of Kekistan was erected in 1016 BC to keep out foreign invaders from their southern border. The Second Kingdom saw a golden age in Kekistani philosophy, literature and meme-making. During this time period a war thought with the Greeks was eulogized by Homer in the Batrachomyomachy.
The golden age is said to have ended with an outbreak of bird flu caused from contaminated chicken tendies. The Kingdom fragmented into warring states, eventually succumbing to invasion from the Persian Empire.
THE ALT-RIGHT INVASION (2016) KEK TRUMP
In 2016, Kekistan was invaded and taken over by Alt-Right forces commanded by Emperor Trump. Kekistanis have been seeking asylum ever since, many of them choosing to flee to the Doge Republic.
THE OVERTHROW OF EMPEROR TRUMP, RISE OF DARK BRANDON. (2021)
The reign of Emperor Trump seemed all but over, until The Libtard Legion led by Dark Brandon committed to an overthrow of Trump's Empire. Libtard war cries could be heard across Kekistan such as "soda," and "chocolate chocolate chip."Many remaining ethnic Kekistanis were driven from their homeland, as Libtard reign was too much to bare. Emperor Trump's influence on the conservative and alt-right migrants was halted by his indictment.Trump's own inner circle began to fracture. People like Cuck Carlson and Darth Desantis break away from under Emperor Trump's thumb.
2024: DEPLOYMENT OF THE KEK GUARD AND ESTABLISHMENT OF NEW CURRENCY.
In 2024, Kekistan witnessed a attempted assassination on the former president Donald trump sparking a resurgence marked by the deployment of the Kek Guard and the introduction of a new currency, solidifying its position in the modern era.
The Kek Guard
The Kek Guard, an elite force of Kekistani warriors, was established to defend the ideals and sovereignty of Kekistan. Clad in meme-infused armor and armed with weapons of both wit and might, the Kek Guard became a symbol of resistance and freedom. Their motto, "For the Glory of Kek," echoed through the streets and digital realms alike, uniting Kekistanis around the world.
New Currency: Kek
To foster economic independence and embrace the digital age, Kekistan introduced Kek, a cryptocurrency rooted in the principles of decentralization and meme culture. Kek quickly gained popularity, becoming a preferred medium of exchange among Kekistanis and meme enthusiasts globally. The currency's value was directly tied to the virality and impact of memes, making it a unique and dynamic economic system. From Pepe to Apu, to the dogs and cats. We may not like your meme but we will continue to fight for your right to meme it.